Home

Advertisement

Customize
About this Journal
Current Month
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
Oct. 6th, 2009 @ 04:42 pm years later
i'm sitting in my apartment and i've noticed how much has changed since i last wrote in here.
i'm a strong young woman now. been through heartbreak, girl fights, and all the high school drama. but i don't feel any different. i know i'm changed. i can think about things and not cry anymore. i can hear stories and not want to scream at people. maybe i'm still immature, no doubt about that. but i have truly grown. i don't know if i like it. all those years in elwood i wanted to meet new people and to have a new life. i've accomplished it. but i miss my old life and friends. i miss caring enough to actually fight with people. now if i get mad, i drop the person. i don't bother talking through the issue, or dealing with the drama. relationships aren't supposed to be easy. and the mindset "i'll never see them again" isn't helping. i have about a year left in college because i chose a fast paced 16 month straight school. i hope i make it, but when i do graduate and get a job, i hope to live in a small town again. maybe even elwood. and i my kids and grow up with my friends' kids. it would be nice..
About this Entry
ghost
Jun. 15th, 2007 @ 06:22 pm blahh
you wish you knewww.


but you never will.
About this Entry
ghost
Jan. 13th, 2007 @ 03:00 pm &mydaytodaywas...
so i haven't been on here in a long while

and i must say not much has changed.
i'm still unhappy and scared and worried.

but now there are more reasons to be.

and now there is more people to hate.

hmmmmmm. maybe i should try harder not to care about anything
About this Entry
ghost
Oct. 4th, 2006 @ 09:34 pm urg


&& that little string of hope i had for us..
is slowly diminishing.

help me.i know we can do this.
About this Entry
ghost
Aug. 20th, 2006 @ 04:57 pm bleh




sooooooooooooo...


is ANYONE actually excited about school?











loser.
About this Entry
ghost
Aug. 14th, 2006 @ 02:16 pm baha
Current Location: homee
Current Mood: anxious
Current Music: afi




sooooooooooooo


school soon.
blah.


and this summer sucked too.


besides my REAL friends.

i love you.


meeeeeeee
About this Entry
ghost
Jul. 20th, 2006 @ 04:59 pm wow
Current Location: home
Current Mood: bouncy
Current Music: bon jovi






i haven't been on here in a while.
i've got new hair.it's short.

and i think i have a completely new additude.

we'll see how that works huh?



me
About this Entry
ghost
Jun. 20th, 2006 @ 02:22 pm summertime
Current Location: home
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: bon jovi
well fuck summer
it's just like the school year was.
SUCKY.



































whore
About this Entry
ghost
Jun. 2nd, 2006 @ 02:01 pm &mydaytodaywas...
Current Mood: content
Current Music: fob
Your Birthdate: August 20

You are a virtual roller coaster of emotions, and most people enjoy the ride.
Your mood tends to set the tone of the room, and when you're happy, this is a good thing.
When you get in a dark mood, watch out - it's very hard to get you out of it.
It's sometimes hard for you to cheer up, and your gloom can be contagious.

Your strength: Your warm heart

Your weakness: Trouble controlling your emotions

Your power color: Black

Your power symbol: Musical note

Your power month: February






woohooo...sophmore.
as you see i'm not very excited. i pray to god next year isn't half as bad as this one was.
About this Entry
ghost
May. 26th, 2006 @ 04:54 pm &mydaytodaywas...
Current Location: home
Current Music: all american rejects
well...it's almost the end of the year and everyone is telling about how they've changed.i know i'm completely changed..donno if it's better or not. but i'm completely different. didn't learn a damn important thing in any of my classes. besides from the seniors in choir "live your life these four years and make the most of it" i plan to. from now on.here's the important lessons i've learned.

1. LIKE EVERYONE TRUST NO ONE.
2. life can change in 2 seconds
3. mistakes seem to be inevitable.
4. no one is perfect.not even close.
5. don't expect too much from people.
6. everything changes.
7. rumors spread like fire...fastest when they aren't true.and when they ruin you're reputation..even faster.
8. no matter how mature you feel or anything. you're still only 15 and have to wait for things.
9. most people only care about themselves.
10. if something makes you happy it's hard work to keep it.
11. you gotta forgive and let things go. fighting is stupid and life's too short to waste it.
12. don't let people take advantage of you.
13. it's hard to distinguish good lies from the truth.

and there's much more...but i don't think i'm the only one learning. so i won't waste your time.
goodbye, love.
About this Entry
ghost
May. 22nd, 2006 @ 05:41 pm music...
Current Location: homeeeee
Current Mood: creative
Current Music: aar
"Dance Inside"

You don't have to move, you don't have to speak
lips for biting.
You're staring me down, a glance makes me weak
eyes for striking
Now I'm twisting up when I'm twisted with you
brush so lightly
and time trickles down, and I'm breathing for two
squeeze so tightly.

I'll be fine, you'll be fine.
this moment seems so long
Don't waste now, precious time
we'll dance inside the song

[Chorus]
What makes the one to shake you down?
Each touch belongs to each new sound
Say now you want to shake me too
Move down to me, slip into you

She sinks in my mind as she sheds through her skin
touch sight tastes like fire
hands do now what eyes no longer defend
hands to fuel desire

I'll be fine, you'll be fine
this moment seems so long
Don't waste now, precious time
we'll dance inside the song

[Chorus]

Ooo, ah [x8]

And I'll be fine, you'll be fine
Is this fine? I'm not fine
Give me pieces, give me things to stay awake (stay awake)

[Chorus x2]

Move down to me, slip into you
About this Entry
ghost
May. 14th, 2006 @ 01:04 pm &mydaytodaywas...
so variety show is this weekend. and it scares the hell out of me.



i hope it doesn't suck.
About this Entry
ghost
Apr. 20th, 2006 @ 09:48 pm hmm
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: my thoughts...weee
and i'm betting..just betting...

this is gonna change my life.
completely.
About this Entry
ghost
Apr. 16th, 2006 @ 08:35 pm &mydaytodaywas...
Current Location: home
Current Mood: disappointed
Current Music: the used
it really is
live and learn.


oh don't worry. i think i might have learned by now.

if not i will learn my lesson eventually.

life is about pain anyways, isn't it?

without it, wouldn't life be boring..

or happy?

hm. well. mistakes must be made. so. therefore. i'm not terribly ashamed of myself.

but then, my mistakes are repeated..so i should feel pretty dumb for making the same stupid mistake over and over.

eh. i'll get it right. i just might need some help getting there. so anyone willing. speak up.
About this Entry
ghost
Apr. 12th, 2006 @ 03:56 pm blah..
Current Location: home.
Current Mood: blank
Current Music: all american rejects-move along
yeah so i don't update anymore.

not like i have anything good to say.

basically...i think i wanna shoot every fucking person in this town.

not a threat...no i will never actually go crazy enough to do it.

but. the longing is still there.


now to be excited!

omg i'm in honors english 10 next year!!! YAY!!! (sarcasm)lol. rather that than normal english tho.

i just cussed out these little kids that live across the street from me..i've always wanted to run them over when i drive..
bye bye!
About this Entry
ghost
Apr. 5th, 2006 @ 08:37 pm &mydaytodaywas...
hmm...what can i say.

i'm a selfish girl.

but i'm not the only one.

and it's not the worst thing in the world to want something for just you.
About this Entry
ghost
Mar. 25th, 2006 @ 06:38 pm boo
this spring break
freaking
sucks
ASS.
About this Entry
ghost
Mar. 13th, 2006 @ 04:14 pm &mydaytodaywas...
strike 3

sorry, you're out.
About this Entry
ghost
Mar. 11th, 2006 @ 02:11 pm &mydaytodaywas...
Current Mood: ditzy
so i woke up and wanted breakfast. instead. i waited and got pizza shack for lunch.







i get to go out for dinner a movie and star bucks. later.
About this Entry
ghost
Mar. 6th, 2006 @ 08:04 pm boo
Current Mood: blah
Current Music: thrice
i want to type.

nothing to type.

so i'll sit and waste my typing on random stuff yet again.

i look dead at the moment...seriously dead.lol

i am wearing sweat pants.

no shoes.no socks. just natural.

i kinda wish i hadn't tried out for show choir.

i am drinking DIET mountain dew...doesn't make me as hyper.

i love my family.

i hope i did well on my honor's essay.

i LOVE volleyball when it's not school volleyball...they don't take it as seriously. and aren't like "you suck, don't bother playing next year."

i hate lying hypocrites.quite a few people are in that..i know i may be at times, but im not ALWAYS.

you gotttttta love people who bad mouth everyone and then go be best friends with them.

my eyes are watering.

i miss summer. MY summer. i miss bikes with chloe.and me chloe and julie riding around trying to find a pool. and phebe.and laura. and tiffany. and weeks with miranda.and nights with a certain person. and a relationship being new. and late nights. baseball.softball. austin and mitch. slips.and bon fires. early morning volleyball. always busy.me.being 106 pounds during the summer.and SUN

so.now i'm out of my randomness. well. soon to be more.lata.
About this Entry
ghost